Desperation
by True Goddess
Summary: He was desperate for an escape anything to not feel the pain anymore, just to not feel. Then he was there, he was there with a warmth he craved for. He had a heat that he wanted, he had a warmth that he would beg for. If he wasn't so desperate for an escape he would have pushed him out, just like he did to everyone else. But for once, he gave in. ( Valdangelo fic)
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer: I do not own Percy Jackson and the Olympians because if I did, Leo and Nico would be together. Sorry Calypso. **

**If you think I should continue, tell me. Reviews make me smile!**

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**Nico**

What have I just done? How could I have been so stupid, how did I think he would except me for what I am? That Jason Grace was wrong, I should have never told Percy. It was for the best that I kept it a secret, the burning in my eyes seeing him with Annabeth. The feeling of a knife being stabbed into the back of my throat when they kissed.

I would take it all again and again. Just to not see the horrified expression on his face when I kissed him. Why did I think it was a good time? How could I have been so stupid, I looked down at the sword. It beckoned me with its' sharp blade. The things I could do with that blade, I could finally end the suffering, I could end all of the pain.

But still something tied me to this cruel world, the boy with the raven black hair and sea green eyes. He will always have my heart, no matter how hard I tried to push it away. No matter how hard I tried to hate him, I loved him. From the very beginning I loved him, he brings out the parts of me I wish to keep hidden. The thoughts of Bianca, when I was the boy that people would have liked better.

When I was happy and oblivious to the cruel world around me, it was when I was the boy who fell for the hero. When I didn't fight the feelings inside me, when I showed my admiration for the boy who would save my sister. But he didn't, and I tried to hate him, I tried so hard to hate him. I wanted him to feel the pain he inflicted on me.

I wanted to hate him with every ounce of my being. But I couldn't, or my heart just wouldn't let me. I took my sword into my hands and stared at the black iron. I sighed and put it back into my sheath, I just couldn't do it. But I was so desperate, I was desperate for an escape. I needed to leave, I would jump of off the ship and swim, but my legs were glued to the deck. I just couldn't take the pain in my heart, I felt it shatter in my chest and I wish to just carve it out. I want nothing more than to not feel this pain, but to instead fill this horrible pain with something else.

Anything but watching my heart break in front of my eyes again and again. Every time I close my eyes I see his face, his mouth slack and his eyes widening in horror. I blink back the tears threatening to fall and hold onto the rail. I bury my face into my arms and fight back the sobs threatening to break out. I push away from the rail and walk to the wall using the shadows to blend in.

I sink down the wall and feel something pressing against my leg in my jean pocket. I pulled it out and saw it was a small dagger. I smiled and dragged it across my wrist, letting the crimson blood spill from my arms. I sighed at the pain, it was helping slowly but it worked. I continued to cut across my wrist and continued up my arms, the pain was intoxicating. I loved the feel of finally forgetting it, slowly I became numb to everything around me.

But it was too good to last, the numbness soon changed into a coldness. It was like the cold that I usually radiate, but instead it was filling my heart, filling my soul, it felt like I would never again feel warmth. I wanted nothing more than a warmth to fill this, I wanted something. Yet I couldn't tell what it was, I was so desperate to not feel and now here I am suffering once again. All because of that dammed boy and my mistakes, all because I couldn't be normal, I couldn't just like the opposite sex. Instead I had to fall in love with him, the boy that will always be out of my reach.

I shivered against the wall leaving my crimson colored wrist facing the sky. I was so numb, so cold, I had never felt so empty. I leaned back against the wall and closed my eyes, finally succumbing to the nightmare and I began watching it replay in my head again and again. I finally gave in and let the tears stream down my face.

"Nico." I heard a voice call out quietly in the dark. I hid myself in the shadows watching the person come closer. I was shocked by who it was, Leo Valdez. Of all people I didn't think it would be him, but now that he is here I am relieved. If I wasn't so desperate to feel the warmth that only Leo can hold, I would have pushed him away. Just as I do with everyone else, but right now I just couldn't. "I'm here." I replied quietly surprising myself from the weakness of my voice.

His head turned into the direction I was in, he sat down beside me his shoulder pressing against my own. I leaned into the warmth, but not enough to scare him away. I hadn't even realized how desperate I was for this warmth. "It's okay Nico, you do know that right?" Leo said after a few minutes of sitting in silence, I was shocked by his words. How could it be okay for me to be what I am, how can it be okay that I kissed him?

"It's not okay Leo, it never will be. How would you have felt if the love of your life would never love you, if you only bring chaos and hurt wherever you go? Imagine your only home being a place that people associate as hell. I'm pathetic, I rather live in Hell than with other demigods." Leo surprised me by not showing any sympathy for me, and I was thankful for that. I don't know what I would have done if he did. "You aren't pathetic, Percy isn't mad at you. In fact he's angry with himself, he feels horrible for making things so hard on you. He believes it's his fault you didn't stay at camp, Nico he's tearing himself apart."

I looked up at him surprised, of course Percy would. My hero would never abandon me, again and again he forgives me. For every awful thing, for all the hate that I showed him, he still cares enough about me. Yet I'm still angry, not at him, not at Jason. But at myself, I should have loved this, I should have relished in his pain. Causing him more hurt, more anguish until he felt what I did all these years.

But again, my heart got in the way of my mind. It wouldn't let me hurt him, it wouldn't let me feel anything but love for the raven haired boy. I want nothing more than to forget him, but he is always there. Whether I want him to be or not he is in the back of my mind. "He isn't tearing himself apart, I am. I want him to feel the pain that I felt, I want him to feel my rage. I want him to be hated as I was, I want to hate him with everything I have."

I screamed angrily balling my fist in rage, feeling myself slowly lose my control over these powers. "But I can't, I can't and I try so hard. But Leo, I love him, I love him so much it hurts." I said angrily, finally defeated by these emotions, I cried. For the first time in years I cried in front of someone, showing the weakness I try so hard to conceal. I felt the warmth of Leo's arm wrapping around my shoulder.

"I can never even imagine the pain that you are going through with Percy. But I do understand the things you have gone through. Never had a home I could call mine since my mother died, foster home to foster home. It was my fault she had died, I am the seventh wheel Nico. No matter if we defeated Gaea, I will always be the seventh wheel, and I see it now. I will never be the hero like Jason Grace or Percy Jackson, I can never be the brains like Annabeth, I will never be the passionate fighter like Piper. I am simply the repair man, the unneeded and defenseless mechanic. I am nothing Nico, at least you've realized where you belong. I feel like I'm not home even at camp, everyone has a home to go to. But Nico, I still failed to find mine."

I looked to him with understanding, finally another who knows how it feels. Another tortured soul doomed to have nothing but misery. How I wish things could have stayed the way they were, Bianca staying with me. If she didn't become a hunter, she would be with me today. I understand she wanted freedom, no longer being a mother for me. But she never understood how alone I was when she was gone.

"I'm sorry." I said sincerely, surprising myself as looked up at the older boy. He smiled sadly, you could see in his eyes that he was just as broken as I was. He just showed it in a different way, instead of being reserved and hiding the emotion, he rather make jokes to show a happiness that he doesn't even have. I didn't even realize how heavily I was leaning on Leo, shivering from my own coldness.

"You're so cold." He replied as my skin brushed against his. I smiled to myself, if he only he knew. "If only you knew how cold I feel." I said looking into his eyes, he moved closer to me and then pulled back. "Trust me I would give anything to not feel at all sometimes." I looked at him and placed my hand on his cheek, barely having control over my own body. He looked shocked but he didn't do anything to move away from me.

I leaned closer to him so desperate for the warmth radiating from his body. If I wasn't so desperate to feel this warmth, I would have ran away by now. But it wasn't only his warmth that beckoned me, it was something else. I put my other hand onto his cheek and pressed my cold lips against his warm ones, and I was afraid. Afraid that he would reject me, afraid that he would hurt me like Percy did. But he didn't, he held me to him and kissed me passionately.

I felt tears threatening to spill from my eyes, never had someone made me feel this way. Never had I felt so warm, and so loved. But it wouldn't last, I knew that it couldn't. He ran his fingers through my hair and moaned into my mouth.

I desperately wanted to feel him against me, feel the heat radiating between us. But I can't do this to him, I can't lead him on, I can't let him think that I can love him. Because I am no longer capable of such things, the warmth I feel is Leo's capability to love. I can't let him give me his heart, because I wouldn't know what to do with it.

We pulled away from each other breathing hard. "I'm sorry." I said getting up and walking away, leaving a stunned boy now unsure of himself. I stayed in my cabin on the ship, ready for our little celebration to be over. I didn't want to think about what happened, I didn't want to think of what I did to Percy. I want only to get off of this ship and return to the only place I could call home.

As we got off the boat I wouldn't dare to look at anyone. Hazel hugged me and said her goodbyes, Frank, Jason, and even Piper. Annabeth and Percy looked uncomfortable and I was fine with that. I was scarred by Percy and it was time that the scars of my life for him began to fade.

"I'm sorry." I said softly to Percy, he shook his head with that sympathetic look of his. "I wish I knew, I could have... I would have... I'm sorry Nico." I smiled and shook my head, "There was nothing you could do." I walked away from them and continued staring straight ahead, trying to forget the boys warm lips on mine. Trying to forget the fire he held within him, my feelings for Percy are beginning to heal. But my one's for Leo have only just begun. "You can stay!" I heard someone shout, I looked over my shoulder and saw Leo, his eyes pleading me.

But I couldn't possibly stay with him. "No I can't." I said coldly, before I began my travel back to the only place I would and forever will belong. The Underworld. Maybe one day I can return to Camp Half-Blood without the shame weighing heavy on me. Perhaps I could even be happy here, but that day has not come yet, and I doubt it ever will. But if it does, and if I truly do heal, I'm willing to do anything to be with Leo. No matter how long it takes.


	2. One

**So I've decided to continue Desperation because I kind of like the idea of Nico wanting to do anything to prove Leo he's worthy of him. **

**To those who reviewed thank you so much! **

** 07- **Glad you liked it, thanks for reviewing.

**ClareDaughterofHecate- **I really don't know how to reply to that, but yea I guess it was deep. Thanks for reviewing.

**I Live on a Phantom Planet- **Thank you so much! I really tried hard to capture Nico's personality in what I was writing and I'm glad I got it pretty good!

**CreCra- **Glad you think so, and I forgot to write in that Nico was wearing long sleeves. I just thought it would ruin it if I put in what he was wearing, so that's the reason they didn't notice.

**Nanay101- **Thanks for reviewing!

**Again thanks times a million for those who reviewed. Please tell me what you think.**

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** One**

**Nico**

It has been a year, three hundred and sixty five days that I have avoided them, more specifically avoided Camp Half-Blood. The first three months was the hardest in the Underworld, my mind kept wandering back to Leo. At first I was heartbroken, Percy was at the back of my mind. Every waking moment I thought of the wrong I had done.

I could see his face wherever I looked, I could see his lips turned down in shock. I could see his face fall from the pain he thought he could have fixed. If only my hero knew that things weren't that simple, but after a while he vanished. It was a relief, it felt like my heart was slowly repairing itself.

That maybe, slightly, there was the smallest of chances; that I can recover from the hell I had lived through. But soon another face haunted me, another memory. His face, his impish smile, the Latino was at the back of my mind.

The way he walked haunted me, the way his hips swayed was hypnotic. The gaze he held, a fiery passion that he held within him. He is like a volcano, molten to the core, yet a tough exterior. He may mask it in happiness, but he is broken in millions of pieces beneath the surface.

I had first thought that it was just because I wanted to get over Percy. But after a while I wasn't so sure anymore, why did his name make my heart pick up pace. Or the thought of his fiery lips against mine, make my skin flush in a way not even thinking of Percy would do?

Why did the thought of staying away forever make me want to cry? I had thought that being away from everybody, breaking away from the ties I had on that realm. That I would be in peace, yet I want nothing more than to go back to it. Go back to the one who is slowly finding his way into my mind.

Soon enough everywhere I looked reminded me of him. The brown of my leather jacket reminded me of his eyes, even my sword reminded me of his dark hair. Everything and anything made me think of him, the damn boy was haunting me.

I've fought monsters, and I fought demons. But the ghost of Leo hurt more than any battle I had ever faced. I had tried to forget him, but my heart, my mind, my soul just wouldn't let me forget the mechanic. I couldn't take being in the Underworld any longer, I IM'd Hazel and decided to stay in Camp Jupiter again.

Since Hazel couldn't bear to leave Frank and he couldn't leave his responsibilities. The chances of them visiting Camp Half-Blood were minimal. Which was exactly what I was counting on. The months in Camp Jupiter wasn't as bad as it could have been, I had trained mostly.

After my time in Tartarus I had become exactly what people expected of me, a skeleton. My skin was paler than usual, my ribs have always shown. But they were so pronounced you could've count every single one, and even the vertebrae from my spine.

Hazel forced me to this awful diet, I had to eat every three hours like I was an infant. Though many times I wanted to lash out at Hazel. I couldn't, she is my sister and I don't want to make her upset. As much as people expect me to be this awful person, this monster. I love my family more than anything, Hazel is all I have.

After my time in Camp Jupiter after three severe sunburns I pretty much gave up trying to be in sunlight. I decided to train in the Pluto cabin. In a few months I gained a few pounds in muscle but Hazel still claims I'm "too thin". If I can't count my ribs anymore I think I'm pretty okay.

But today is the day I have been dreading for three hundred and sixty five days. The day I had to return, the day I had to face my fears. Not only seeing Percy again after that night, but seeing Leo. The boy that just wouldn't leave my mind.

I had promised Hazel that I would meet up with her and Frank at Camp Half-Blood. I just refused to go on the Argo, I can't step onto the ship. Not with all those memories held within it, all the regrets, all the pain. I shake the thought away and walk to the showers. I try to clear my head, I had to sleep for a while so I could make the travel to Camp Half-Blood.

Whenever I think of the name my stomach is turned into knots. I dress quickly and put my sword on my belt, I look into the mirror and try not to punch the glass. I remember searching desperately for the Nico I was before Bianca died.

The happy go lucky kid who never listened well. The one who just couldn't shut up for a second, I hate everything about myself . A part of me always will, and I try to heal. I try to make myself become someone people would want to be around. But every time the thought of it fills my head I push it away.

Just as I do with everything else, I will never belong and I'm a fool if I truly thing I could. I tear my gaze away from the mirror, my confidence slowly diminishing. I want to run, I don't want to face him, I don't want to see the hurt on Leo's face again.

I don't want to see that boy, the one I left in the night his face filled with confusion, frustration and pain. All of the things I had never wanted to leave on someone, all of the things I had felt. I sigh and begin shadow traveling to the real hell.

The sunlight shines in my face and I cringed in annoyance. Camp Half-Blood, it looks just as it did the day I had left. I walked in through the borders, looking at the golden fleece around Thalia's pine. So many things have happened, so many good and bad things to this place.

How many times have I wished for it to be destroyed, yet it perseveres through anything. I walked through the camp, my hands stuffed into my jean pockets. "Nico?" I turn to the voice and find no other than the hero himself. Perseus Jackson, the boy that has haunted me for far too long.

Though he looks nothing like a boy anymore. His black hair falls into his eyes, and his sea green eyes shine with happiness. His olive skin tanned from long hours in the sun, he smiles at me one of those smiles that used to make my heart race. I'm glad they don't anymore, I nod at him. "Percy." He smiles and hugs me, it surprises me.

I hate being touched, I push him away my face flushing from the contact. "Don't touch me." He smiles at that and much to my annoyance ruffles my head. "Good to see you kid, you look much better now." I scowl from under his beefy arm and smack it away. "Nice to see you too Percy." I say through gritted teeth, I turn to see Hazel's curly hair running towards me.

She throws her arms around me and I hug her back. "Hi Hazel." She smiles one of her Hazel smiles, the ones I have to fight not to smile back. Which leaves a grimace on my face, "I thought you were going to come tomorrow." She says smiling brightly, I shrugged nonchalantly, "Mine as well get this over with." I mutter under my breath, she elbows my ribs and I scowl at her.

Soon enough Piper makes her way towards me, with Annabeth, Jason, and Frank in tow. I was glad not to see Leo, it was far better. Things will be better if he doesn't show up, "Hey Nico." They all eco, I wave awkwardly hoping I could leave.

"Where's Leo?" Hazel asks much to my dismay. I flash her a glare but she ignores it, I crouch lower into my height. "He's probably sleeping, sword training has been kicking his butt." Jason says with an amused smile on his face, I raise an eyebrow at the news. Soon enough the mental image of Leo with a sword in hand is way too appealing.

"I'll catch up later, I'm going to... Unpack." I practically whispered before elbowing them out of my way and making my way towards the Hades cabin. My "home" away from "home. I open the door and find it exactly as I had left it. Old jeans thrown onto the floor, and a few t-shirts. The only difference was a few of Hazel's things were in the room.

It was all neatly packed in her own area, and the curtain was closed off for my half of the room. I frowned at the thought of sharing the cabin. Camp Half-Blood was where I was free to be a slob, now I have Hazel to nag me when my t-shirts are on the floor. I sat on my bunk and looked at the dark red painting of the room.

It hadn't changed since the day I left, the smell of earth in the room. The Greek fire illuminating the house ensuring there are shadows wherever I step. There was a knock on the Hades cabin door, two simple raps.

I got up and slowly walked to the door, I opened it and it felt like my heart stopped. Leo in the flesh, my heart pounded in my chest my palms became slick with sweat. I didn't know what to say to him, I had tried to play out the scenarios in my head. All of which started with me reaching out to him, not vise versa.

"I had to come and see myself." Leo said, his voice deeper and more mature. He lost the baby fat in his face and looked more like a man. His jaw was more defined and his cheek bones more prominent, he no longer was the lanky boy I once knew.

He shot up in height, a head taller than me. He gained muscle over the year, now he wasn't Leo the impish boy. I realized I must have been staring and responded to his statement. "Well, I'm here." I replied awkwardly.

He smiled, a heartbreaking smile. "I thought you'd never come back." I shrugged looking down and letting my hair fall into my eyes. "I didn't think I would." His smile turned into a frown and his brown eyes filled with tears.

"You said you couldn't possibly stay. You made me feel like shit for so long Nico! I thought..." He trailed off heat rising to his face. I looked down and sighed running my fingers through my hair. "I-I didn't know what to do Leo. I couldn't... not after Percy."

I replied quietly, not able to speak. The emotional strain I was getting right now was just too much. "I know, but you didn't have to leave me like that. Gods Nico, I know I'm selfish for wanting you to stay after everything that had happened. But I was finally over you. forgetting you, and now that you're back, I'm not so sure what to think anymore."

He turned around to leave and I grabbed his arm, I couldn't lose him again, I wouldn't let him forget me. "Leo, wait." He turned around, an anger boiling in his eyes. He ripped his arm from my grasp a hostile expression on his face. "I waited Nico, I waited three hundred and sixty five days. I thought there was something wrong with me, it's time you waited! You may have come out kissing another boy, but I don't plan on it!"

He said angrily tears filling his eyes. "I've hated myself for so long Nico, and now thanks to you I have another reason to hate me! I killed my mom, and now I'm gay. As if I couldn't be a disappointment enough. Just leave, it's too much emotional trauma for the both of us." With that he stormed off, I sat at the steps of the Hades cabin and held my head in my hands.

It was a mistake to think that love would be easy. Love is a war, and our first battle has just broke out. The only question I have, is how devastating the effects of this war will be.


	3. Two

**Sorry updates are going to take a while now because I'm in a play and I have like so much homework! Which I haven't done yet, but who cares no school tomorrow. Anyway, thanks to these fantastic people who reviewed. **

**fandomsforever- **Thank you, I'm really glad you think so!

**RandomReader- **Why thank you, I'm really glad that you guys are saying that I portrayed Nico's emotions well because that took so much work! I was so afraid I wasn't portraying him correctly so it's a relief to know that I am! I'm so glad that you're enjoying it!

**PlatinumAnime07**- I'm sorry the last chapter my computer deleted your whole name and left only 07. I tried to fix it but it was no use. I'm so sorry! Anyway, this is mega angst even for me and I write way too many angst fic's.

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**Two**

**Leo **

I was already confused, yet now I'm even more so. Seeing Nico again, felt like a wound was being reopened. Yet at the same time, my stomach flipped and my heart started racing at the sight of him. Nico had changed over the past year.

He looked different, and gods it was a great different. His dark hair had grown longer just above his collar bone and it hangs over his dark eyes. He's also tanner, which shocked the Hades out of me. Nico Di'Angelo and tan don't usually belong in the same sentence.

He's grown too, he's taller but he hasn't reached my height yet. He also put on more muscle and gained weight, he isn't painfully thin anymore. In other words, the ghost king looked dangerously sexy.

But I push those thoughts away, because he hurt me. After realizing my sexuality, I've never hated myself so much until now. I've had guilt ever since my mother died, but now as if being a son of Hephaestus wasn't bad enough now I'm a gay son of Hephaestus.

I had tried so hard not to think about guys that way. I forced myself not to think about the way Nico looked, or to avert my eyes whenever Jason would flex.

I tried not to think about it, but every time I tried my mind would just take me right back to what I tried to avoid.

I know it's the inevitable now, that I am what I am. But I refuse to come out the way that Nico did, I'm not going to kiss a guy and then mutter that I'm attracted to the same sex.

The thought of even saying it scares me, I know Jason wouldn't judge me. But still it scares me more than anything to admit to these feelings that I'm trying so hard to fight.

The worse thing is, I tried to hate him. I wanted to hate Nico, I wanted to hate him with all of me. But whenever I try to think of him as the cause of all of this I think back to that night. I can still feel his lips on mine, a ghost of what was once there.

His cool lips meeting my hot ones, and the way it felt melted my insides. I relished the feeling of him against me, the coolness of his body pressing against mine. My fingers tangling their way into his glossy black hair.

I continued pounding the metal under my hands, my muscles straining from the activity. My mind wandered back to what I tried to steer away from. _Nico pulled away his pink lips swollen from the force of our lips against each other._

_He looks at me his eyes filled with pain, and tears threatening to spill from those gorgeous eyes. "I'm sorry." He whispered before walking away from me. I called for him to come back but he left me. The next morning during breakfast he didn't come out._

_I had looked down into my waffles, the smell was no longer appealing. Jason elbowed me and raised an eyebrow. "Are you alright?" I looked up at him and smiled. "Yea I'm fine man." Once we made it back to Camp Half-Blood we all said goodbye to Nico._

_It hurt me the most, it felt like someone was putting needles into my heart. Every step I took was another needle added. He started walking away and my mouth opened on its own accord._

_"You can stay!" I shouted my heart pounding in fear of his answer. He turned back to me, his face impassive. But there was a sadness in his eyes and I suppose that's what gave me false hope. _

_"No I can't."_

_He replied, and it broke me into a million pieces. But every night I would think of that look he gave me when we kissed. The look he gave me before he left, with longing and regret. _

I shook my head and brought myself back to the presents. I raised my hammer high and threw it across the forge screaming in frustration. It left a decent dent in the wall and I sunk to the floor the pain becoming too much to bear.

I curled into a ball on the floor and held my head in my hands. All I wanted when I came to Camp was to finally belong, to have something I had never had before. A home, at least Nico had somewhere to call home and although people associate it as hell at least he belonged somewhere.

Everyone belongs somewhere, but children of Hephaestus only belong in a forge. We are nothing but the mechanic demigods, useful for one thing only and that's to fix things.

All I wanted to do was fit in, and I can't even do that correctly.


	4. Three

**Sorry I haven't updated in a while, I'll try to update more. **

**Thanks to all of those who reviewed, so glad that you guys are liking it. Please review and tell me what you think.**

**Ryan**

_All I wanted was him. _

I stray from the correct path, the path of a hero. I wish I could say that I had a choice, that I didn't have to do what I did. But there wasn't a choice, at least there wasn't a choice to me. I just couldn't lose him, I won't give up on him.

No matter what.

I continued walking down the streets of New York hating myself, hating everything, and wishing, I haven't stopped wishing. I prayed to the gods that he was alright, but I'm not so sure if he is even alive.

_When I was twelve years old my home was attacked by a monster. My mother had just come home from a long shift at the hospital, and she just wanted to get some sleep. The doorbell had been rung right after my mother had sit down. "I'll get it." I said walking to the door and she smiled at me appreciatively. _

_There was a woman at the door, she was in a business suit and has an awful smile. Her teeth were yellowed and her makeup was done so awfully it looked like a child had done it. "May I help you mam?" I asked politely._

_Her smile only grew and soon enough her teeth turned into fangs. I yelped in fear and closed the door sprinting down the hall my socks sliding. I heard a thud on our door and looked back to see claws. My mother stood up and cursed. _

_"Ryan! Catch!" She threw me a bow and after that a quiver filled to the brim with gold arrows. "Mom?" I asked shocked, my mother was an archer when she was younger. She was exceptional at it and one countless awards throughout her life. But she gave it up due to money and went to college for nursing and met my father then. _

_"Don't question me right now, just shoot when it comes." I nodded and once the door broke down we both fired arrows. My mother's arrow struck the creature right in the chest while mine hit it directly in the eye. It shuddered and exploded into dust. _

_I looked back at her shocked. "Mom?" She sighed and pulled me towards her. "It's time I've told you who your dad is." I was shocked beyond belief, and I didn't want to believe her. But everything she said screamed logic, it made sense why I tanned so well. Also why I could always pick up a bow and without any practice shoot straight and true._

_"Mom... I can't leave you." She smiled and smoothed my hair out of my face. "You have to, I'll drive you there. I can't afford to lose you Ryan, okay?" I nodded and she sent me to bed, but I didn't stay. I knew that if we left when my mom could which was in a week. That creature would return for me, and I couldn't endanger my mom in that way._

_So I packed all of my clothes, all of my allowance, and a picture of my mother and I. I wrote her note explaining myself and I left. I walked from our small home in Olympia Washington and took a bus to Montana. _

_It was a hard first two months, until I met Adrian. Adrian was everything I had needed on our journey to New York, he was the voice of reason, he often stopped me from doing irrational things. But not only that, Adrian has a way of drawing people to him, yet pushing them out._

_Usually I wouldn't bother with people like that, but I can't help myself. Adrian is a special case, where I want to try to be better for him. Because he deserves it; he didn't have the luxury of a supportive parent. His father often was disappointed in him, where other boys would consider doing sports. _

_Adrian was inside curled up with a book, he is brilliant; his mind works in a different way. He views our world in a totally different way and it intrigued me. When he was twelve his powers began to spiral out of control, and his father told him the truth. He then gave him the spell books and told him to prove his worth to Hecate. _

_It was a tough and he tried so hard, he learned so fast. But his father always said it wasn't enough, and though I believe his father was awful. Adrian says the only reason his father did those things, was because he feared for him. _

_I often wish I had the capacity to see beyond people's exteriors and look deep within them. But so far, I cannot. _

_Though I had learned a lot from Adrian, and I loved him... I love him, with all my heart. I lost him, I lost him one night and I never will forgive myself._

_We had been traveling together for three years, and my fifteenth birthday had just passed. We were setting up another camp for the fifth time that week. We always were on the move, it wasn't safe for us to stay in one place. Adrian was practicing swinging his staff around, and over the years he has gotten significantly better._

_He know can move with a finesse and at the edge of the staff was a stone made of some magical substance, another gift from his mother. He continued doing these moves as we walked his muscles flexing and his face red from sweat._

_"Don't burn yourself out, Rian." He smiled at that and stopped turning towards me. "Don't you worry about that." He said with a wink, causing a blush to rise to my cheeks. Things were awkward between us, not completely. Some moments it felt so right and other moments it was just scary. I was afraid that our friendship would be ruined if I let my feelings get in the way._

_But I was wrong, after we kissed... Things changed, but it wasn't so bad of a change. We continued walking until we stopped at a suitable spot. Adrian laid down our things and put up the sheets we had above a few low branches making a make-shift roof. _

_"All set, want me to go get some food?" Adrian asked his forest green eyes piercing in the evening sunlight. "No,I-I got it." He smiled standing up, "Alright, don't take too long. I'm starving." He exaggerated smiling playfully. I shoved him and nodded, "Alright, see you in a few. Don't miss me too much."_

_I teased, he rolled his eyes and caught my arm. "Wait, just in case anything happens to me. Take this." He said handing me his necklace. I raised an eyebrow, he never took off that necklace. It was a black cord with a green stone the color of his eyes. "No, I can't." He rolled his eyes and held out his wrist, "I have the bracelet, I can only use it once. The necklace is usually more helpful magic, but for now just keep it. I can't let anything happen to you."_

_I blushed and he brushed my sandy hair from my eyes. "Our lives our literally a game of chance, and I can't lose you Ryan. So please, just do it." I nodded never taking my eyes off of his. "Okay." He smiled and kissed my lips quickly. "Be quick." I nodded speechless and he smirked once again, and it was the last look I saw on his face._

_Holding his staff lazily with a smirk on his face, his green eyes sparkling playfully, and his dark hair falling into his eyes. When I got back food in my arms I found our camp empty, the fire was slowly dying and there was no sign of Adrian._

_I smirked at first and thought he was joking but after a while I knew it wasn't a joke. I couldn't find him anywhere and I was panicked. I dropped the food and broke into a sprint screaming his name, I couldn't lose Adrian. He was all I had left. I kept screaming for him the rest of the night and I sobbed myself to sleep from exhaustion in the middle of the forest._

Weeks and months I looked for him, but it was no use. I was ready to give up all hope, until Echidna came. She is the mother of all monsters, probably the most hideous and nastiness thing alive. She promised me Adrian, and there isn't anything I wouldn't do for him.

Then again, when anything involves the one you love. In a moment of desperation, one would do anything. I finished climbing up the hill, my bronze skin glistening in the sunlight from sweat. I wiped at the sweat from my forehead, and retied my red bandanna.

I looked at my destination grimly, Camp Half-Blood. I took a step towards the camp just to hear the roar of a monster. I turned around and saw one of Echidna's children. "You've got to be kidding me." I groaned looking at the monster.

That began the fight.


End file.
